On December 7 my granddaughter would have celebrated her 18th birthday if she had not passed away on January 15th of this year of what the death certificate listed as "probable cardiac arrhythmia".
I've been making 4 inch finished heart blocks for a quilt to honor her memory - hearts because I loved her with all my heart, miss her with all my heart and her heart is evidently what caused her death. The word "probable" seems to me like her cause of death is still a mystery. As part of the autopsy cardiac genetic testing was performed but they found no defect that would cause her death. She was healthy one day and found dead in her bed the next.
So, anyway, when December 7 rolled around I celebrated her birthday by finishing up the last 86 blocks I need for my quilt. I now have a total of 300 blocks for a 15 x 20 layout. I also celebrated her birthday by thinking of her but I do that every day. I witnessed the miracle of her birth and that seems like it was only yesterday.
Kayla
December 7, 2004 - January 15, 2022
And sew on...
22 comments:
I find myself missing dear ones now this time of year, too. It’s even worse when they are so much younger than us. I’m thinking of you and Kayla.
Your quilt is a lovely memory quilt of Kayla. You are a wonderful grandmother and Kayla knew how much you loved her. You were a blessing in her life and she was a blessing to you.
That will be such a pretty quilt and hearts the perfect block. I knew a few people whose children died suddenly but occasionally they find a heart defect that was there from birth and never detected. When they don't find a defect that is where the "probably" might come into the picture. No matter what it is so hard to lose a young one.
Hearts are the perfect way to honor Kayla's memory. Beautiful quilt.
Thinking of you Cathy, your heart quilt is the perfect way to honour her memory.
So painful for you. Thank you for sharing both your grief and your healing.
Beautiful way to remember Kayla.
What a wonderful tribute.
Oh Cathy. Your post made me cry. So sad, such an awful loss. Your heart quilt is a fitting tribute to dear Kayla. Thinking of you, your husband and family.
What a huge loss. So hard to understand how that can happen. The quilt is beautiful and a lovely memorial for Kayla.
I think of your granddaughter and of your loss every time I read your blog. I can't imagine the hurt in your heart. But I love that you sew on...and I bet she would have wanted that too.
What a beautiful tribute to your most precious Granddaughter. It's lovely.
{{{{Cathy}}}} Your hearts are a lovely way to remember your dear Kayla.
A heart for every heart broken by Kayla dying so young. If only real hearts were as easily mended as fabric ones....lots of strength and love to you, as you navigate the holidays (and beyond) without her. <3
beautiful hearts...my daughter the nurse says any insult to the chest when the heart is between beats will cause sudden death...can happen to anyone...it's often why young healthy athletes die suddenly...
I tear up every time I read about your granddaughter. It makes me appreciate my grandchildren all the more. Sending healing thoughts and prayers your way.
Sending another wave of hugs your way - your heartache is palpable in your posts about this quilt project.
I hope making the hearts in Kayla's memory is bringing you solace. The grief may lessen, but it never goes away.
Pat
My condolences on the loss of your wonderful Kayla. Thank you for writing about her, writing about your grief, and continuing to talk about her. I deeply appreciate it, and learned how to deal with some of my own feelings because of your writings. Thank you.
I looked first for a way to send you a private email. If you are not interested, please delete.
https://takecontrol.substack.com/p/died-suddenly-world-premiere
https://takecontrol.substack.com/p/myocarditis-after-covid-vaccine
Laura Haynes
Sorry for the loss of your granddaughter. Such a sad loss.
Laura Haynes
This is going to be a gorgeous quilt! What a great idea!
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